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Sunday, August 2, 2009

Power Of Kindness - Humility

Dear friends.

Hope all of you are doing well.

Recently, I have chanced upon another wonderful book (well, it was one month ago actually) called "The Power Of Kindess" by Piero Ferrucci, Psychosynthesis Practioner.

This book tells of all the amazing possibilities one can achieve through leading of a life of genuine kindness and it is divided into 19 parts or areas of Kindness, e.g. Empathy, Patience, Warmth, Honesty, Sense of Belonging, etc. Through which, Piero gave several intepretations and explanations on how Kindness would be able to "change" the world, both the world AROUND us...and the world INSIDE us.

I am going to start off this series of sharing based on the book, on the different aspect of Kindness and, share my feel about it. It would be great if I can get to hear from you too, and possibly, your own personal experience.

For today, I would like to touch on "Humility".

Quoted from Piero's book,

"Humility places us in a state where learning becomes possible. It gives us the taste of simplicity; and when we are simpler, we are also more genuine. Humility put into practice allows us to touch reality as it is...I am one among many, mortal and limited, a human beings among human beings. I do not have to prove myself superior to anyone. Others exist, each with their needs, their realities, their hopes and their dramas, and I am one among billions of people who exist on this planet..."

Without Humility, learning ceases. Once we start to say that we know enough, it is the the time we stopped learning. But more importantly, without Humility, we start to feel that we are superior as compared to others. We feel that we know more, we are better, we are smarter than others. And this is where problems arises.

One very good example would be of teachers and their students.

It is known that teachers who are humble enough to know that they do not know everything, and that they, too, make mistakes are usually the teachers who are better accepted by students and well loved.

On the other hand, teachers who uses their position and assume they know more things than the students, that they are "better", are usually those who are disliked by the students.

One personal experience that I can share now, is my Brazilian Jujitsu training.

We now have Jaguar, a BJJ blackbelter, training us. And the entire class respects him thoroughly.

NOT because of the fact that he can possibly kill us all with his techniques (which he can, especially since he trains and teaches for Mixed Martial Arts, Kickboxing and Capoeira.) And also not because his build is bigger than most of us.

The class respects him because of his humility...even as our teacher.

Jaguar would provide us with training and as best as he could, explanations about it. But he would always, and I mean, ALWAYS, assume there are better techniques than the ones he taught us, and ask us for our feedback/questions.

I am grateful that I have a teacher like him.

My other teacher, Darren, is also similar. He is the Gym master who is well trained in many Arts. E.g. He is a blackbelter in Hapkido. And as a Hapkido blackbelter, he is considered a "Master". But, he never wants to be called a "Master". And when he is, he would always ask people not to do so, saying, "I, myself, am still learning. So, don't call me a master."

And it is so true. We are always learning. So how can we become a "Master" when we do not know EVERYTHING.

As what Confucius said,


When you know that you know, let people know. So that people may be able to add on and you can learn.
When you know that you don't know, let people know. So that people may be able to teach you and you can learn.
That is called Knowing.

In short, have humility and you get to learn and grow.

However, in other aspects of our lives, the same applies. Through humility, we get to build a stronger bond with others. It could be our friends, colleagues, loved ones, and family members.

We must accept that we can never know everything about a person, which is why, there is always something new to learn from them. And with humility, you know that you want to learn more, and NOT to compete with the other person WHO KNOWS MORE.

When you have humility, people accepts you better. Without humility, people will move away from you.

Again, by Confucius.
三人行必有我师
When we are with others, there is a teacher amongst them.

When you have humility, genuine respect for others will follow. And that respect would be returned in favour.

Regards,
Ken

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