Attracting the Wrong Types...Part 3

Dear friends,

As I have mentioned in Part 2, this last part would be on how to know who is the person for you.

I can't say that this is a definite formula...however, what I can say is that I have used this method on people around me to helping them uncover what they want...Especially in finding a suitable person.

So, a little background first.

When you ask your friends or people around you, "Do you know what you WANT in your partner?" or "Do you know what sort of partner you want?"...

The answers would usually be, "I don't know..." or you would get very vague answers from them, which indicates they don't really know.

But don't get mistaken nor give up. These people DO know what they want...It is just that, they don't know how to GET to knowing.

So start, simply ask them, "So what is it that you DON'T WANT in your partner?"

You can be sure, you would get a list of attributes or adjectives from here.

This is also the list that is important towards helping them find out the answers.

Here's how.

Let's take for example, Friend A says, "I don't want my partner to be a jerk. A flirt. I don't want my partner to be a bum also."

So, from here, you would get a list of the following:
1) Jerk.
2) Flirt.
3) Not a Bum.

Next, with each item, just ask, "So, what is a ______ like to you?" (E.g. What is a Jerk like?)

And from here, you would get another list of descriptions. Say, Jerk = irresponsible, vulgar, insensitive, crude, rude, etc.

This list would lead you to doing the last part. Which would be asking, "With those attributes in mind and that you don't want those attributes in your partner, can you now tell me what attributes you want in your partner now?"

And all you need to do with your friend is to simply tackle each adjective said.

For example,
Irresponsible = Responsible
Vulgar = Polite
Insensitive = Sensitive
Crude = Gentle
Rude = Well mannered

And if you want to go further into details, you can even ask your friends for some examples on each attributes, "So, how would you be able to see that this person you want is Responsible? What would he/she do?"

And voila. The process is quite complete. From here, you would have helped your friend to get a detailed description of NOT what your friend don't want, BUT of what your friend wants...with details and examples which he/she can see in real life.

Once again, to summarize it all.

1) Ask what they don't want.
2) For each attribute, ask for descriptions.
3) Following which, ask for the OPPOSITES of each attribute.
4) Get details and even visible examples.

There you have it.

Once again, I must say that this is not the formula. But what I do suggest is maybe you can try it and see whether it would work for you.

BTW, please also tag me or register your email so you can get updates.

Cheers!
Ken